What I Am Learning About My “Courageous” Self…. (When I Transition…)

I say this word with a HUGE sigh,  some restlessness …and many exasperated  sighs of angst!

I have had so many transitions that I have been through in the last month and it’s taken SO MUCH COURAGE. I am going to share with you what I learned about them. Sometimes you have to chase this part of your life and living down, like I chased this sunset below. I love this picture, because   it reminds me of tenacious I should be  as eager pursuing my goals. Like  I chased down this sunset, I should be the same about chasing down my purpose and fulfilling it.

Sun Setting, By JennRene

 I call this one:

Sun Setting By JennRene

So here  are my courageous transitions:

1. I left my full time job and found myself adjusting to a new life and schedule. I thought this new life would slow me down, but instead it sped me up, yet in a very delightful way… I found I have a new passion and its making me extremely joyful!

2.  for the past year, I  worked with women in recovery, and I ended relationships with about 24 women I  worked with for the past year or more…,( so I had a lot of  natural grief I endured)  but I made it! It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do in my life in terms of letting go… of so many relationships at once. You become really connected as a therapist.

3. I  began a new assignment working with and volunteering my time with a program for women where I am learning so much and sharing in teaching groups.

4. I joined a Celebrate Recovery group - (I have always wanted to attend one, so I could lead  groups at my church…yet what I am learning about myself is extremely  mind blowing, in the process!) I think everyone should do  a Celebrate Recovery class, we have so many hidden parts of ourselves, that never evolves, unless we decide to take the initiative.

5. I found myself involved heavily in social media  consulting and helping  create content for blogs for people  who needed help, and… THEY PAY ME FOR IT!! ( smile…) Of that, I am proud.  I really love social media, and researching for content. I find the culture of it, extremely fascinating.

6. I began this esoteric ( if you will- ’esoteric’ means something is only understood by a select few…) spiritual journey that helps  me to see myself extremely different, I don’t  feel like myself anymore… it’s weird, because I feel like someone else, actually as if I am living a dream and it’s definitely a selfless dream!

7. I feel extremely motherly… like I feel as if I have  mothered women extensively for the past two years,  ( both on the job) , and not on the job, and because of it, i feel as if I have this supernatural powers to mother… it’s  like so surreal.

8. I feel as if I am giving birth, because not only am I in a learning curve, I am  learning MORE about ME…  Transitions  7 & 8  combined  informs me I am becoming  a better mother and I hadn’t even realized it before I wrote this!

9. I have felt like my entire life is shifting, because I am writing more, and documenting more  about social media and I even went to a screenwriting session at a college, the other night! (And… I didn’t even initiate  it! my husband wanted to surprise me and had me go!) I love when he stretches me like that! (He knows I want to create documentaries one day, and supports my vision.)

10. I believe my biggest shift has been in working in my job,  three days a week. I didn’t expect to stay on, but then, I ended up sharing  and leading groups; and still teaching my same three groups. Changing from being a primary leader to a part-time leader  sort of shifts  your career and how you view it in a major way.

 Life Lesson: All of this teaches me three things I have learned about myself in the past few weeks:

1.  I learned that despite how much I don’t like transition, it’s gonna happen anyway, whether we desire it, or not.
2. I learned that  I absolutely LOVE my new life and the sense of vulnerability that comes with it…it’s making me JOYFUL.
3.  I learned I am tremendously brave. Despite my reservation I had months before I left, I am developing and cultivating a different kind of peace, that looks like COURAGE.  And it feels AMAZING!!!
4.  And last but not least, I am learning how to  acquiesce * (yield without protesting) . To Life and Living… in fact its the entire reason why  I began this blog! To fully embrace the  grace of life! And by golly, I am definitely getting it!
5.  I found myself in being absolutely VULNERABLE and it’s making me again someone new! Which is  absolutely  relevant to Living a FREE Life!