Self Expression Magazine

Who Makes a Facebook for Their Newborn?!

Posted on the 29 November 2011 by A Girl In Converse @_girlinconverse
Okay, so I know when you have a baby, you want all your Facebook friends to see them sleeping and crying in their cute little bows and mini UGGs. You even want them to see the baby as a little cashew in your black, ultra-sounded tummy. I'm guilty as anyone -- usually if I find out someone is pregnant, I creep their profile more than usual just to see how cute their baby is (what, you've never done that?!) In case you don't already have a handle of this baby-on-Facebook phenomenon, how many of you have a friend that says: "Aw Jackie's new baby is so cute!" In which you think aloud: Who is Jackie?! "Oh you know, this girl I graduated high school with... her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend's sister."
I have my own opinions about the sharing labor stories on your Facebook status. And as far the pictures of you in labor go... you know the saying, "A picture is worth 1000 words..." Yeah, I think I can come up with some.  But that's an argument for another day...
Who Makes a Facebook for their Newborn?!What got me going this time, is the fact that a (deleted) Facebook friend made a Facebook profile for her newborn, just a shy TWO MONTHS after the monster was born. Okay, maybe that is not nice -- no baby is a monster. But I guarantee this baby is destined for monster-ism if their mother is already making them a Facebook profile page. I'm sure they are friends by default, so when you think about it, the kid didn't even get a chance to ignore her mother's friend request (the poor thing).
Anyway, I didn't check the profile out (I have limits on my creepiness) but what do you think she wrote as the statuses? Do you think the mother of this child wrote statuses like "I finally burped! Thank you, Mommy, for not giving up on me." Or do you think she actually lets the baby on the computer and the whole page consists of updates such as, "ahufeaigrjfskfsi?"
Well if nothing else, I think I just found out the fastest way to lose some Facebook friends and to coin the term "crazy."
Someone please make the craziness stop...

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