You're A Redneck If....

Today at school, in my MCA (Media Computer Applications) class, we were doing a last minute project, entitled: JOKE. You had to find a joke or come up with one on your own and use an application on the Macintosh called 'LIVE TYPE' to complete it. It's like making text animated and move and what not. It's pretty nifty. I was searching for jokes to do, because I'm not a very funny person, so I just Googled (v.) a joke to do. I found the category: REDNECK. I love redneck jokes because they are just too ridiculous! So... I picked my joke... 
"You're a redneck if..... 
        You get dressed up to go to WalMart."
I kind of summarized a redneck joke from this site: http://www.fortogden.com/foredneck.html
Here is my school project page, where you can see my joke using LiveType: http://www2.gresham.k12.or.us/~biggs4/Joke.html
I wish I e-mailed it to myself, in class today so that I could upload it. 
I wanted to say a few more CLEAN 'You're A Redneck If...." jokes because they make me laugh or smirk. 
So, also from fortogden.com, here are my favorites....
YOU'RE A REDNECK IF....
                          You think possum is 'The Other White Meat'

                           You think a quarter-horse is a ride outside of the WalMart 

                            "You're whole family is democrats, 'cept Little Mary, She learnt how to read."                          

                            You think fast food is hitting possum at 65mph
 

   The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife
                            You own a homemade fur coat                            You stare at an orange juice container because it says 'CONCENTRATE'

   They raised the drinking age in your state to 32 on account of they wanted to keep alcohol out of the schools.

                           You think a turtleneck is the key ingredient for soup


                           You think the French Riviera is a foreign car
                           That billboard that says "SAY NO TO CRACK" reminds you to pull up your jeans
                           You ever named a child after a dog
 "When you was little, your front yard got toilet papered and your momma thought it was a gift from God."
                             "You removed the back seat from your car so all yer kids could fit in."
Those are just some of the funny ones. I liked them all, but these were my favorites. :)
Pictures from Google Images :)