Self Expression Magazine

4 Tips Plus Resources To Keep Loneliness From Stealing Your Joy

Posted on the 02 September 2015 by Chasingjoy @chasing_joy
4 Tips and Resources To Help When You Are Feeling Loneliness I am a 35 year old single woman with no kids (yet).  I know I have a lot to be thankful for.  My time is my own. My money is my own. I am only responsible for myself.  However, I have to admit sometimes being a 35 year old single woman with no kids can be a lonely place.
At this stage in life I most of my friends are already settled into family life.  I have friends who have babies, little ones transitioning into kindergarten, and big kids transitioning into college.  I have friends who are newlyweds and friends who have years of married bliss (hopefully) behind them  I am not at the same place as most of my friends. That means I often find myself feeling a little lonely on the weekends when it seems like everyone is doing family stuff.  Like any good blogger I took my feelings to Pinterest and found a couple of really useful Pins about how to manage those feelings.
Beating Loneliness. 100 Things We Must Remember!
 8 Tips to Overcome Loneliness, A Guide for Women
 7 Tips for Overcoming Loneliness and Fear of Being Alone
One thing that seemed to be a common them amongst these Pins was the tip to reach out to others.  Even if in the midst of feeling lonely we feel like everyone is busy or like we don't fit in, it is good to reach out anyway.  The thing is we have to make sure we have people to reach out too.  We have to invest in building healthy joyful relationships with others.  To do this I thought the takeaways I picked up in church this week could come in handy.
As I mentioned in my VEDA Video Epic Tails 3 Church Takeaways, I think the pastor's advice on how we can help our churches also applies to other things.  We can apply these same 4 tips to building better relationships.  So what are they:
  1. Invite:  I tend to get nervous about inviting people into my home but I am working on it.  Invite people into your home, to your favorite restaurants, to a movie, to your favorite park. etc.. Basically invite people into your life.  Invite new people. Continue to invite old friends and family also.  Don't take them for granted or assume they know the invitation is always there. 
  2. Serve: I am not as good at this as I should be.  Offer to be of service to your friends.  Offer to babysit, feed their pet when they are out of town, help them with a project, etc.  Basically offer to be of service when you see a need, even if it is not expressed. 
  3. Give:  I think I do OK in this area but can always improve.  In addition to giving of your time by serving others you can give financially too.  No, I'm not saying pay  people to be your friend or become their personally ATMs.  Where we spend our money does say a lot about what we value.  When you remember your friends at their birthdays and other times with a gift (even a very small one) shows that you value them.  If you see something small that you know they would like get it for them.  Treat for lunch or coffee sometimes.  Basically don't be cheap and stingy.  Those people tend to not have many friends.
  4. Pray: I have been improving on this thanks to the Chasing Joy Prayer group where we pray for people each week.  Most of us remember to pray for our friends who are sick or going through rough times.  However, it's good to just pray for our friends and family members regularly.  You never know what they may be going through and not sharing.  Also pray over your relationships in general that they would be fulfilling and strong.  Prayer Works.  
Sometimes it is hard not feeling like you are in the same place as your peers or  in other ways disconnected.  I hope armed with the practical advise from the Pins and applying these 4 tips to your relationships we can all feel less lonely and handle it better when the emotion does rears its ugly head.  
Feeling lonely is a normal emotion we all feel.  How do you keep it from stealing your joy?  What do you think of the using the tips for building stronger relationships?

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