Don't hate me for reporting this but now that Thanksgiving is over, the Christmas season is officially here. Holy shit, where did this year go? And holy shit how am I going to survive this holiday season being so broke?! Chaque choses en son temps...
Before heading to our work T-gives dinner yesterday I went to the gym to burn some pre-feast calories. I made the mistake of telling Antoine, my inconveniently attractive aerobics instructor that it was Thanksgiving and explained that I would be stuffing my face this weekend. He took into account what I had said and severely kicked not only my ass but the rest of the class in a double class of Body Attack and Taille/Abdos/Fessiers.
In my entire French fitness career, I have never heard any of the other students groan from the pain except for yesterday where the complaints were a-pouring. "C'est pas possible!", "C'est pas vrai!", "C'est horrible!", "Aye! Ca fait mal!", "C'est méphistopholique!" It's Mephistopheles-esque? It's evil? Ok, that one was pushing it. It hurt but not like a cone biopsy in the caverns of hell hurt. It wasn't unmanageably painful. When we got up from our 500th leg lift that was made excruciatingly more difficult with an elastic bound band around our ankles for resistance, the class wasn't just annoyed but they were fucking pissed. "It's not Thanksgiving for us!" one woman shouted. "Why should we have to suffer!? We're not American!" another woman added in agreement. Dressed brazingly American in an old Minnesota Twins t-shirt and Victoria's Secret yoga pants that read the words 'Pink' on the butt, I kept my eyes glued to the floor because I had a felt the heat of everyone's eyes on me. They really weren't joking, they were pissed.
At the end of the class as everyone was putting their mats and weights back, Antoine commented that while the class did a good job, it wasn't exceptional. He would be expecting more work from our bodies than our mouths next week before wishing me a Bon Appétit. Through the mirror, I caught a woman roll her eyes.
Today being Black Friday, Séb point blankly asked me if people were going to die today in America. I told that I hoped not but if the sales were good enough that it might be a possibility. I explained that the stores will mark select quantities of items on sale. For example, I remember one year only 100 Sex and the City: The Movie DVDs were on sale for $9.99 which reeked havoc at Best Buy because everyone just had to get their hands on the blockbuster smash turned perfect stocking stuffer but wanted nothing to do with it at its normally marked price of $19.99.
To celebrate Black Friday here in Paris, I'm going to get buzzed on vin chaud sold at the Christmas vendors along the Champs-Elysees and walk down Avenue Montaigne and daydream. At least I'll be pompette on cheap, sugary hot wine. The trick is to go with an empty Starbucks cup and pay an extra euro and change to have it filled up. If nothing, I'm resourceful. Now that the holidays have officially started, I refuse to skip my holiday songs on my iPod which means Mariah, The Waitresses, Wham! and of course Elvis will be ready to rock with me around my mini Christmas tree!
To my all of you in The States, stay home and go shopping next week and my friends in Paris bon week-end!
Thank you all for your warm Thanksgiving wishes!
