I just got back from my goodbye dinner at La Perla with Phil who will be in the States for 2 months. I'm not sure if it was the frothy Cinnamon Margaritas that I was washing down my Spinach and Goat Cheese burrito with but I teared up when I said goodbye and felt forlorn when I closed the door behind me. After everything that has happened this year, Phil remained the only true friend to me who didn't abandon me when the chips were stacked against me.Ironically, on our walk back home, we had bumped into Alison; someone who I had once upon time considered a good friend but haven't heard a peep from since the break-up. She made a whole dramatic scene with flailing arms about how much she missed me and wished that we still hung out. I cooly told her that my phone number had not changed nor has my facebook and that I was easily reachable. She kept insisting that we get together and talk. I politely told her that while I was not upset with her, I wouldn't have chosen to handle a heart-broken friend the way she did and lied that I'd call her sometime.I learned a lot this year about the people who I thought were my true friends here in Paris. What is it about when someone is going through something that can make people disappear? Are we only friends with people who only bring non-stop excitement and entertainment to our lives? I was cautious about not burdening people with my misery but I noticed that I was slowly was getting uninvited to get togethers and was no longer tagged in facebook photo albums.A big life change like moving to a new city forces you to form relationships with people you normally wouldn't if the circumstances were different. Theres always that first round of friends who you cling to based on loneliness. When I think back on all of the cities I have lived in and all of the people who were at one time part of my everyday reality, I've only taken one or two them with me in my heart. You can't take everyone with you.I definitely took an emotional beating this year but its life's way of weeding out the undesirables and allowing the real stars in your life to shine. I will miss Phil very much but have a feeling that no matter where I end up, we will always be connected.La Perla 26, rue François MironParis 75004
