It is no secret anymore and it is time for me to come out and say it, “My name is Lawrence and I am an author!” My book is all about my humorous escapes or narrow escapes. You may ask, “who cares”, well frankly, I do. And if you like to laugh, so should you.
Have I given up on dating? No, despite various disappointments recently, I continue the quest to boldly go where others have gone before in search of the Holy Grail. OK, not for the holy grail but just for a special someone.
At my age, as at any age, women either fall under the divorcee or the single category. Yes, there are others but…
I have met many divorcees on social media and these women seem pretty cool and looking at their profiles you find out that they are young. Late 20s, early 30s. Why are these women divorced at such a young age? They are funny, smart, sexy etc, so why would any sane man let them go? Or are they sane? I have not met these women, so I do not know whether their STBXH (which apparently stands for Soon to Be Ex-Husband) is insane or the smartest person alive? I hear stories like, “My best friend came home one day and said we are not compatible anymore.” WTF!
You ask a man and a woman why they got divorced and the women will come up with a plethora of reasons until you stop listening, feeling sorry that you ever asked. If you ask the guy, he will say “Dunno. She is an idiot.”
You remember what happened when Mickey got divorced?
My best friend, you know him as Ed, says “I never knew what happiness was until I got married, and now I miss it”. Groucho Marx said, “Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.” That is obviously the reason I have never been divorced. Robin William’s will say “Ah, yes, divorce … from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.”
Are these women now damaged goods? Will they trust men again? Have the men who abandoned them, left them scarred for life? I hope not, because these are the kind of women who I am dating. I do not want to wake up one night with a woman’s hands around my throat because she was angry at her ex. I am not sure I will be able to breathe.
“The only time you run out of chances is when you stop taking them.” ~ Kelly Ellzey. Believe in that, as I will take a chance on you in the hope that I will not find your hands at my throat. Maybe I should put a note in my will stating that should I die by strangulation, my debts will not be paid.
