Mainly, this is for my inner shopaholic. I really need to control my shopping impulses…
When near purchases, ask yourself:
1. Do you want this? Yes!
2. Do you need this? No! Put it down and walk away. If it’s online, X that son of a gun before you do something you are going to regret.
When near promotions, sales and clearances, ask yourself:
1. SAY NO TO CONSUMERISM AND WALK AWAY IMMEDIATELY. If online, SAY NO TO CONSUMERISM AND X THAT SON OF A GUN BEFORE YOU DO SOMETHING YOU REGRET.
But it’s so cheap!
1. So?
But it’s on sale!
1. SO!?
But it’s buy 1 get 1 free?
1. SOOOOOOO!????????
Okay. I don’t want to buy it now. Actually, no, I lied–I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT IT! THIS OBJECT I DESIRE MUST BE IN MY POSSESSION!!!
1. Can you live without it? Like really live without it? Probably. NO.
2. What really happens if you don’t buy it? Probably…nothing.
3. Then don’t buy it. PERIOD. Save your money for something more important.
But, but, but….
1. Deep breath. Inhale, exhale.
2. Now slap yourself. Left cheek. Right cheek.
3. Hey look, a flying squirrel. WHERE!?
4. *WONK* (the sound of a frying pan hitting face)
5. Done. You’re saved. Thank me later. Wooooot!
