When you hear the word Grinch, what do you think of? A green man who despises Christmas and happiness? Yeah, pretty much. I’m going to be honest, sometimes I think of a certain family member. I just can’t help it. Many, many years ago, a tiny baby was born. She was the first grandchild in the family and was loved by all. She was blessed with two sets of grandparents. Unbeknownst to her, one of the grandmothers was a tiny bit jealous of the attention the other grandmother lavished on the baby girl. As the years passed, the jealousy seemed to grow until one Christmas the girl noticed. The green-eyed grandma began to inspect the Christmas presents that were left under the tree and would make all kinds of comments like “When I was little all I got was some candy, nuts and an orange. Hummph.” The comments would continue on and on until no one in the family really wanted to go visit this grandma or have her over to inspect their presents (to try to see if the price tag was still on them).
As time passed, the girl grew up, and one set of her grandparents was no longer with her. She missed them greatly and would always remember how generous they were to others. If there was someone in need, they immediately asked what they could do to help. She thought the jealous grandmother would realize the error of her ways and become more like the grandmother the girl loved so much. Sadly, this was not the case. If someone was sick, the grandmother was worse off. If someone was in the hospital, the grandmother was going to the doctor for an ailment. If someone wanted her to visit them, she couldn’t travel and would refuse to visit unless they came to see her. If someone got something new, she made a noise in her throat and pinched her lips. At Thanksgiving, she had many invitations to visit family members, but refused to budge. Then she had to tell everyone how she stayed alone on Thanksgiving (with her husband).
It is difficult to please this type of person. People give her gifts and she compares them to see what is worth more. If she doesn’t like it, she says it won’t “do”. Her husband has bought her countless gifts that have been taken back for one reason or another. Jealousy can be defined as “a state of fear, suspicion or envy caused by a real or IMAGINED threat to one’s possessive instincts.” Unfortunately, it is difficult to stop this cycle. Jealousy comes from fear and it is obvious that she is afraid she will never be as important as everyone else. Honestly, I would like to stop giving gifts at Christmas because of this. No more family gift exchanges. We do a cookie exchange or make meals and freeze them for her. We do a “girls” day and ask her to lunch. She won’t feel as important unless we make it about her. The gifts are just one more way she can compare things and quite frankly, I’m tired of it. Lastly, I did not point out the obvious, but she can quote the Bible to me in her sleep. Except maybe the parts about ummm coveting I believe.
“The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves.” ~William Penn, Some Fruits of Solitude, 1693
