Welcome to my site. You may want to check out my book, "Kill Me Now!". Thanks for visiting!
I was invited to a wedding of the grandson of someone from the local gym. Why would this person invite me to his grandson’s wedding, is anyone’s guess. Dare I ask him? He will probably say that he wants me to rejoice with him in his grandson’s happiness. OK, it is not the first time this grandson is getting married so I guess the grandson is just a serial wedder or just good at making bad choices.
So, I will go to this wedding unwillingly. Why unwilling? Well I have never met the grandson although he is only a few years younger than I am and the only person I will know at the wedding is my friend, Toby. I will be delegated to a table with other people whom I have never met and frankly would be just as happy had I never met them. Some people will say it is good for networking while I say I would prefer to spend the night curled on the sofa with my bride-to-be. Wait a minute, why was she not invited? Is she not supposed to suffer along with me? For better or for worse? But then again, why should she suffer? She would only know me there.
Credit to: http://www.funnypart.com/funny/wedding-cake.shtml
So I got to this wedding wondering why I was there, having written out a handsome check for someone who has more money than I will see in a lifetime and wonder why we do this to ourselves.
When I get married many people will be there just to make sure that I am actually going along with it. My best friend, Ed, who you all read about in my book, “Kill Me Now!” will be there alongside me. I am not sure whether he will use the silver bullet on me or else whether my betrothed paid him to make sure I pitch up. Is that fair? He is supposed to be protecting me from myself.
For as long as I can remember, I have never been to a wedding in which I can say that the food was tasty. You normally fill yourself up on the finger-food that is offered in the reception area and then have no appetite for what is supposed to be the main meal.
The ceremony itself is often late and the food arrives cold and you look at it and feel sorry for the chef. He spent hours working on this and because the ceremony started late, the food is inedible. The only thing I remember about weddings is how bad the food was.
We all wait for the ceremony and then the food while thinking to ourselves what excuse are we going to make when the bride comes up to you and asks you why you aren’t dancing. “Frankly my dear, I don’t know anyone here,” for which she will say this is my cousin, “Tabby, twice removed, she is looking for someone to dance with.” “But, I haven’t brought my dancing shoes and my left toe is giving me problems.”
Why do we do this to ourselves? If we do not want to go, why can we not say no! Wait a minute; I am supposed to be getting married soon. Is this how some of the invitees will look at my nuptials? Probably. I must look at my list and see who doesn’t want to be there and not invite them. That is not a possibility, is it? Doesn’t everyone want to be there? Isn’t my wedding supposed to be the who’s-who wedding of the decade?
I had better take my own advice and make sure that the food is tasty or else people will complain about the food at my wedding.
