Self Expression Magazine

January Realisations.

Posted on the 01 February 2019 by Lucyvictoria
So the dreaded January has vanished...and I for one am thrilled! I do hope 2018 was a productive one for all ? The new year is definitely in full swing and on paper, my month has been good, but in theory, I've hit some hurdles and it's affected my month. Thankfully, I'm a resilient character & have drowned thoughts out during the days {however, when you have had sinusitis for a week after not being ill in years, and feel ready for your next B12 shot, you know you need to do some cathartic writing!} 
For my own sanity/mental health and protection of a close family member, I don't wish to delve too much into the finer details, but dealing with negative events that occur within your own household are not topics you like to broadcast but lately, I am feeling particularly reflective and wish to discuss some serious matters...In the hope of reaching out to someone who perhaps deals with a Jekyll & hyde character. Or use it as you will!
January Realisations.No-one, especially someone close, should make you feel inadequate and doubt your own skills. For instance, empathy is very different to sympathy- 'feeling sorry' for a person or thinking about how you would feel in their situation, doesn't quite cut it. If you find that you're not getting the sufficient support you may need, I say...swim to another path, change direction. I always think of myself as family-oriented. I love all of my family; my brothers are everything, my nephews whom I adore, every single person, but you sometimes become aware of bad vibes that make you second guess yourself, why? Why should any-one make you feel discouraged or dampen your spirit
January Realisations.
Sometimes, you realize who is true to you and who isn't. I find it really tough if said people are actually 'family'. In my opinion, the definition of the word means support, security, someone who shares your problems:: Many nurturing connotations right!?
Now surely, family (or friends) shape our personalities- we learn from one another through our lives; they boost self-confidence, speak truths, grow from mistakes, own responsibility....
       If you suddenly find the opposite happening, what do you do? Cut ties, remove the toxicity, resume routines, accept unwarranted opinions? Unfortunately, it's happened to me previously, 13 years ago, and it's a horrible feeling. Eventually, you confront it head on, you talk, argue even, agree to disagree, forgive but never forget, explain your reasoning for removal. Thankfully, it all worked out, talking and listening in a non-judgmental manner was hugely advantageous!! I just hope my latest situation sorts out just the same...
If you've followed my blog or looked back at my previous posts, you will have read that I've had a tad of a rollercoaster ride since I was 16. Now I can't stress enough that I have never made an excuse of anything in my life due to the fact of having brain surgery- but due this fact, I was changed as a person but I'm pretty proud of how far I've come. I may have hit a bad patch some time ago, but I work hard at being me & haters aren't wanted! I won't tolerate negative verbal diatribe headed towards either my mother, or me. When you have the biggest fan who happens to be your mum, anyone knows how strong that bond is.
       So, is any of this familiar to you !? I'd love to hear some stories or tips on how you respond...
For now, happy February ❤️
January Realisations.

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