Self Expression Magazine

Learn to Say NO !!!

Posted on the 01 April 2012 by Unforgettable

Imagine a person continuously saying haanji haanji haanji haaanji (yea yea yea yea)..!!! w/o even taking a notice, listening or thinking about the words being said by his confronter. He is a man, yea only a man could do that 'cause I have seen no woman doing that till now in my life... and we are going to consider him as a real nice, jolly man having no hard feelings in his heart for anyone. He makes other people laugh with his gained wits during his upbringing and tries to be as pleasing as he could be with everyone he meets. You just have to ask for a favor or request and an affirmative answer of haaanji haaanji haaaaanji zarur ji zarur would be buzzing in your head the same moment again with no thinking of what has been asked or what not has not been asked for. No doubt, some might consider him even more good than I described but certainly he has a problem of not able to say no to even favors he doesn’t want to favor.
So, that was the imaginary picturisation within my head but as the adage goes 'to each its own' everyone has different personalities attached to them. I will refer to the ones who consider obligated and pressurized if some colleague of them or a person superior to them asks for a favor and they don't like the idea of saying NO just because they haven't learnt to do so. It even becomes more difficult or un-imaginable if the advantage is taken by the fairer sex. (If you are a girl, you must have laughed here) [Boys Bracket: If you don't want  yourself to be taken advantage of read after the bracket]. Learn to say it now.  Learn to say NO and tell your neighbors and friends that while they are turning towards learning English at this age after getting influenced by the ads given by English Teaching Centers, you are proving yourself different by learning something really great and helpful.
 Sometimes people agree to do a work that they wouldn't have taken if given a choice and get landed with work that isn't theirs. Remember, here i am talking about saying no to a favor that you have just accepted to do cursing the asker of it under your breath and effecting your peace of mind an regretting that you could have slipped or excused and not the work that you are actually obligated for. So, also learn as to where to use this art of saying NO. It should not be your word to be used at every situation rather, at situations where you think you would be doing it with a heavy burden on your heart and two-three abusive words will be automatically spelled out while performing the favor. So, bare the favor asker this time with this trouble as now you have come across this related content. *Win-Win Situation. Isn't it ???* ;)
Further, I would mention here… as the techniques of karate are to be used only for self defence the same is with this art. Don't use NO for every other work that you are asked for, especially at your workplace and home betu, solid pitoge ;)
And, you also must need to know that saying NO is not being nasty or dis-respecting in any way. So, always be assertive. And remember that there also lies a behavior that can lie in between nice and nasty. So, you need to balance between them and make your decision free from the limiting effects of the environment and their possible consequences. Your favor asker will by now get to know about your factor and will amend his/her behavior according to that. After all, it should be your choice to do some voluntary work. So, if you want to, do it happily, if not, say your learnt thing with ease and confidence and you now no more need to blabber or say bad things about him/her thus, staying consistent with your peace of mind. Yeaaa… for sure you can use your charm, humor, truth, fun, mischief or deliberate manipulation.  And what more effective thing could be… than a smile. Nice factor is noticed by none, X factor tohhhh is..... a must have ;) So, next time, when someone asks you for a favor that you want to avoid, Use your acquired weapon… NO
And, I do hope that no reader of this content will adopt the situational song which goes like 'Na Na Karte pyaar tumhi se kar gyaaa/gayiii' (Fell in love with you while saying NO NO)
Here, I am requesting my readers to please share their NO stories if you already have said No many times and let the readers know the power of NO.
Have I left out on something ??? Comment your say !!!

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