There isn’t a woman I know who doesn’t have trouble describing herself as “beautiful,” even if she is. It was eye-opening seeing the depths of this during a self-portrait lesson, where we saw the almost explosive collision of every female photographer’s desire to be beautiful but fear of being presented that way.
Why are we afraid of beauty? Why can’t we see it in ourselves? If you watched the little video here, you watched the women interviewed by FBI sketch artist Gil Zamora confront the difference between how they described themselves and how a total stranger described them. What keeps them from seeing their own beauty? What keeps you from looking for your best features, and instead, pointing out your flaws?
It takes a lot of effort. Instead of talking about things like “freckles” and “wide nose” and, dear God, “big teeth” when I look at myself, I have to actually force myself to say “nice skin” and “red hair” and “heart-shaped face.” You know, words that might actually be flattering. Now you try it. Instead of pointing out all the things that keep your face from being “perfect,” whatever the hell that is, take a good honest look at yourself and point out something that’s a good feature. If you need help, show the video to a friend and then describe each other. You might discover some good features you never noticed about yourself.
Seriously, we all talk about real beauty, but can we really appreciate it in others if we can’t find it in ourselves? Give it a try. I think you’ll be amazed at what you find.
