Usually, I'm pretty good under pressure, but lately, I and my wife have been under pressure for a few months. Part of the problem has been resolved, yet there are outside "forces" that are still turning the screws and causing problems/pressure.
The other night I did something that was completely out of character for me, and it effected me immensely. I was so upset, I just crawled into my bed and stayed there till the next day. I was literally shaking. The next morning I got up, still feeling like crap, I made my wife and I a coffee, and we went out on our deck. It was a beautiful morning, and the temp was around 75f. I had a sweatshirt and a pair of jogging pants on, and I was literally shaking. My wife, at first, thought it was because i was cold.
I explained to her that the temperature had nothing to do with it, and that I thought I was soon going to have a nervous breakdown. Well, she got up from her chair, came over and gave me a hug, and said it would be alright. I wasn't sure about that, but just that simple gesture, made me feel a lot better than I had.
Things have calmed down considerably, and hopefully they will stay that way..... but for now, I'm still struggling with forgiving myself.......
Take care of you, and learn how to forgive yourself if you are ever in that position................. BB84CBJNBGNM
