Sleeping with the enemy can be quite an experience. Is it possible to get any sleep?
Well, Sharon and I have been dating and I spend the night quite often, but last night was a nightmare. I can only say “Kill me now!”
I knew Sharon snored, it is a sweet low pitched sound that is so cute. Barely audible when spooning.
Last night, in her sleep, Sharon rolled over and put her arm on my chest. Yes, say it “Awwww, how sweet!” and played a bit with my chest hairs. I fell back to sleep.
Moments later I was awaken by the sound of a terrifying earthquake, chewing and grinding its path through my brain. It was Sharon’s snore! She had her mouth against my ear and her sweet gentle snore was now a terrifying dentist’s drill bit punching its way into every bone in my body. She had pinned my arm to the bed with her body and disabled any thought process by sawing through my brain. How do I shut her up? A pillow, maybe? Wait a minute, if she snores, am I allowed to fart?
I woke her up the only way I know how. I kissed her gently on the lips.
“Yyummy” she mumbled and rolled over onto her other side! Great!
Problem solved? Hell No! She had taken half my blanket. So now half of me was freezing. I am going to start using a hammer and nails to claim my half of the blanket. Or maybe just invest in another blanket? Or sleep on the floor? At least I have material for the third book in the trilogy.
I am doomed! Kill Me Now!
