Illustration by Jennifer DeDonato
With all the news that has been thrown my way this month, absorbing all of it has been overwhelming to say the very least. Last week, I received not one but three interesting, and eerily identical e-mails that I have let marinate on my mind for the past few days. These e-mails were from former New York colleagues and work contacts at top fashion houses dropping a note to say hello, and to inform me that they will resign from their positions to pursue a simpler life.
This I was not expecting.
I was surprised to hear that not one, but three of them have made the decision to say goodbye to 70 hour work weeks, messy apartments with clothes everywhere (because we were never home!), and are on a quest to live life! Bravo! I never would have expected this from these three. These were painfully skinny, ambitious girls who lived and breathed their jobs, thrived off of their promotions and praise from our bosses, and had grown accustomed to their generous work perks like clothing allowance (Side note: I never had a clothing allowance, I worked in a sub-division of IT. No one cares about IT.). I thought they would be lifers in this corporate game, but I guess I thought wrong.
My first two years in Paris, I quietly broke off communication with former work contacts because I had nothing career-oriented to share. While I was doing things for myself, I wasn't doing anything that would be deemed impressive "on paper". I wasn't making nearly as much as them, as my position was much lower than theirs, but I had security. Security that I gave that up to live extremely modestly off of savings, and supporting myself with odd jobs that I was actually lucky to get in Paris. As risky as it seemed to others, I loved every minute of this journey. And while I believed in my move, I also knew that the New York corporate world would have trouble swallowing why in essence, I gave up my life to struggle in another country - France no less.
One colleague, incidentally a native-Parisienne who thought I was insane to come here without a plan, has started consulting from home while she gets her yoga certification. Something I actually remember her musing about during our many trips out to the warehouse in Jersey. She has since downsized by giving up her one bedroom in the West Village for a large studio in Greenpoint. The other will be moving to San Francisco to be closer to her family, will manage the books at her friend's family vineyard (amazing!), and will be taking sculpture classes. And the third is moving upstate to start a family with her boyfriend of ten years.
Perhaps pursuing yoga and sculpture, and stopping work to start a family seems like privileged choices that not everyone can afford to make. I get it. High rent, student loans, and bills exist, and are in fact a very real part of my life. But if you can follow your dreams by starting small and creating a five year plan to realize them, coming from someone who has done it alone, I say it's worth the risk. Before I moved to France, I was pinching every penny I had to cushion my savings, and living way below my means to make this happen. And no, I don't regret missing out on after work drinks at 60 Thompson in order to save up for a life in Paris.
Saying all of this, I can't help but wonder: Did I have it right these past three years? Is living a frugal yet fuller life the way to go? Or is it that us fashion girls who came from The Devil Wears Prada generation are searching for more in life than next season's it bag? Or is personal growth and exploration the new black?
Who knows. Thoughts?
Whichever it is, I have to say that it feels good to know that I'm not the only one from my previous life who has taken a leap of faith. My response to these ladies who are downgrading their salaries in order to pursue their passions on a tight budget:
Be prepared to learn how to cook, and to accept last season's looks in exchange for more sex (especially to the one starting the family) and time than you did when working grueling hours in a cubicle. Welcome to living life...oh, and did you get my Pinterest request?
Now I ask you: Have you ever made a huge life risk? Have you ever regretted your decision to follow a dream? Have you often wondered about your life that could have been had you stayed on the "straight and narrow"?
I'd also like to take this moment to share how happy I am to read the statuses on Facebook and Twitter trickling in from friends and family on the East Coast, and to hear that they are safe after the gruesome Hurricane Sandy.
I also want to thank you some of you who have e-mailed me in regard to my mother. You'll be pleased to know that she is safe and sound in London, presumably torturing the English as well as the staff at the Kensington Waitrose.
I hope you and your family are safe and toasty inside!
