No...
Not unless you count a heavy heart. Not unless you count the heavy shackles of an un-free life. Not unless you count the footsteps I took as I walked away from the crumbles of before or the gratitude that weighs more than of those other things put together.
Have you waken up in pain lately?
No...
Not unless you count how it feels to open your eyes to an entirely different world, in shock. Not unless you count the loneliness that can be only described as pain, as it sits in your stomach and turns itself over and over until you fear moving at all. Any movement might spill your insides out, and he only lives in your insides now. The few fragments of the old world might spill from your mind- and the very idea of that sears the walls of your heart as your eyes blink in this new day. No, I haven't woken up in pain lately, not unless you count the burning.
Are you taking any medication?
No...
Not unless you count the hours of writing and the long stretches of yoga. Not unless you count the coffee dates with friends and long rambling online conversations. Not unless you count the cups of sunlight I drank yesterday, and the sprinklings of moonlight that I crumble into all my homecooked food. Not unless you count the days I sleep too much, and the ones I sleep too little. Not unless you count the way I laugh and laugh about myself and life until I ache in a good way. Not unless you count thankfulness, the sort I am addicted to, the sort that I inherited, the sort that flavors everything in my life so it tastes like luck.
Do you have anything else to add?
No...
Nothing that counts.
