Diaries Magazine

3 Lessons from Our First Season of Marriage

Posted on the 29 June 2013 by Alyssambirchfield @lyssmbirchfield

I can hardly believe it!

Six months ago today, I was frazzled, stressed, overwhelmed, and crying on anyone who would offer a shoulder. And yet, I was also the most blessed, joyful, and overwhelmingly in LOVE I’d ever been!

In the midst of a fairy-tale wedding, I got to begin a fairy-tale marriage that day. {Well, sort of ;) }


The past six months have nothing short of, well, an adventure! Not only have they been the first six months of marriage for Craig and I, but also the first six months spent in our new home of Ohio. Needless to say, there have been a LOT of lessons that I’ve learned – and not always the easy way :)

1. Laundry, Dishes, & Cleaning Never End

“Never say never”? Whoever came up with that apparently wasn’t a wife or mom ;)

Joking aside, God has been working wonders in my own heart through even these most mundane tasks. I’ve been in a short season where I’m not working, nor going to school – home is all I have. My heart was quick to become discontent in the first few weeks.

“This is all so meaningless. I want to do something with purpose! Doing laundry and washing dishes is all miserable. What difference am I really making?”

Finally, I recognized God’s voice whispering in reply, “If you are faithful in the small things, you shall be faithful in the bigger things. Why are you so quick to think that this work is beneath you? This is your chance to serve Me, and to serve your husband. Do not take it for granted.”

2. Marriage is Death

Now, before you jump to conclusions, I do not mean that marriage means the death of anything good in life (as our society so often jokes).

Marriage is death. It involves death. It revolves around death – that is, the death of my own selfish wants and desires.

“And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.” // Galatians 5:24

In order to love and serve the Lord best, I must deny myself and my own wants and desires. It’s not about me anymore. It’s about Him. The same goes with my husband. It’s not longer just about what I want, doing what I please. I must consider him better than myself, and seek to love and serve him with every fiber of my being.

3. My Spouse Will Never Make Me Truly Happy

I fall more and more in love with my husband every day. But no matter how hard he tries, he can never fill the place in my heart meant only for my Creator.

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