Christmas is Cancelled

Get ready for an emotionally brutal post, not sure how long I'll have the courage to keep it up...
The day after his wedding my dad sent out an email thanking everyone for attending. Thanking my sister for flying 1000 miles, and my brother for driving 4 hours between finals, and for his wife's kids for coming. Hoping that everyone who attended got good karma from the event and how he loved those who were there that day. With no mention of me, my name, or
my lack of presence, but I was the only person copied on the email who did not attend. Fair enough, I was going to let it slide because I know the message he was trying to send me: Fuck you. 24 years of this and I know how to read between his lines, and I was all ready to be the better person and ignore it.
But my brother wasn't. My brother, who silently endured the mocking and pressure to stay in sports by my father who called him a pussy for quitting the football team, stuck up for me and called my dad out on the email. It was amazing!
I responded saying I was tired of the guilt trips and backhandedness after all these years and I just wanted to get through our last Christmas as happy as possible. Somehow that email instigated his new wife to tell him I had warned her that he hits and cheats on his wives - woops.
So now I'm not allowed to be there for Christmas and I'm fine with that. I have family and friends and a boyfriend who've watched me be broken by my dad again and again (mentally and verbally). But I'm at the point where I don't want this negative and controlling influence in my life. I think about him in my future putting down my in laws or ruining my wedding because all three of his wives are there- two happily married. And I wouldn't want my hypothetical children around him so they can
A) be told to get out on a CA highway and find their own way to PA because they grumbled when they were woken up at 4am (me at 19)
B) have a glass plate thrown at them when they admit they have suicidal thoughts and want help. Instead they are told to get out of the house and that they ruined Christmas (me at 19)
C) find their grandfather choking their grandmother on the couch and have to call the cops from a neighbor's house and then hear both parents lying and joking about it to police (sis at 18).
Because if any of those things happen to my family or friends, I'd commit murder to protect them. And that's not a healthy option. Don't worry, I will seek out professional help, again, after all this but I've worked through most issues with them already. This is the first time in my life I have the power to walk away, and I don't want to turn back.
If anyone is in a similar situation feel free to contact me. They have no power over us anymore.
Happy news: Last Christmas shopping spree this weekend $$$