A very kind and obviously delusional friend told me my posts on Facebook from this week were sorta funny. They also told me that I had a small butt so I’m not sure I should really trust their opinion. But heck, both compliments made me feel good so I thought I would post some of them here. Happy Friday! Hope you too feel like your ass looks small and perky today as well…
Monday: I’m listening from the other room as my daughter is teaching her little brother how to say the words dinosaur, football and vagina. The things that all men love.
Tuesday: I forgot to bring my son’s bathing suit to the pool today. I did remember his swim diaper so he looked like an 80-year-old European wearing a wiener bikiner.
Wednesday: My son just yelled “mama” only 30 minutes into his nap. I’m going to believe he yelled, “This nap is awesome & I’ll be here for 2 more hours so you can go check email and watch The Real Housewives of Orange County”. Sounds just like “mama” to me…
Thursday: How many of you have ever put a blanket over your child’s pee covered sheet in the middle of the night just to be able to go back to sleep? I’m uhm….asking for a friend…that’s gross and I would never do that myself….cough cough.
Friday: A friend took me to the pool at her country club yesterday with some other moms – I probably didn’t need to show them my terrible bikini razor burn and announce that it looked like I had herpes. Why can’t I have a filter? Oh yes….because I’m a New York Italian.
