Closed the last of the windows in the house today, and turned on the heater for the first time in about 90 days…roughly 50 of which have been solidly without rain…a major feat for the Seattle metro area. The last couple walks this week were chilly with thick fog in the air, with the kinda chill that soaks into your bones, and this morning, the rain (albeit only a little of it) finally began to fall.
…This weekend will begin the chimney smoke smells, and make limp all the crunchy tree leaves along the sidewalk, and push people into their coat closets, looking for the one lost glove, and begin digging out all the sweaters from the bottom drawers again.
We had a hell of a summer, so I don’t really mind that it is time to start snuggling up. The weather has been kind to us.
…Tonight (payday) was for food stocking again, and this time I grabbed some stew meat, a roast and veg, to break in the new Crockpot. Some chili and soup mixes in the pantry…and some hot cocoa…I am so ready for fall now, and I can’t wait to eat it.
Bath night for Daphne and Niles.
They hate it so much…don’t like change any more than I do, really…even for the better. Daphne particularly, will sit and pout in the corner of her Grecian pillar cave and not come out even for dinner, afterward. Niles isn’t fond of baths either, but is a total whore when it comes to food, so will magically forgive me, soon as he hears the top of the food can unscrew. He’ll eat it all like he’s starving, then sit at the top of his bowl and look over into Daph’s, watching her food just float, totally ignored. And it drives him fucking nuts.
Niles: “…Are you gunna eat that? Hey?! Hey?! Hey, you girl! Are you gunna eat that, or what?”
Daphne: (From her cave.) “Don’t be ridiculous. Can’t you see I’m in the middle of my big dramatic scene here? One doesn’t just ‘eat’ mid-performance.”
Niles: “Yeah, but…it’s gonna get all soggy and stuff. Then fall apart. Then cloud everything up with fish-gut-parts.”
Daphne: “Please. I am trying to concentrate. Is she looking?”
Nile: “What? Who?”
Daphne: “The person. Is she looking?”
Nile: “A little bit, I guess. Why?”
Daphne: “Does it look like she’s troubled about something?”
Niles: “How can you tell?”
Daphne: “A wrinkle between her eyebrows.”
Nile: “Nope. Nothing.”
Daphne: “Damn. I did an extra swish-flip of haughty disdain this time, when she put me back in the bowl. I was sure she’d notice.”
Niles: “I don’t see anything.”
Daphne: “…Maybe I’ll just sit in my cave a little longer.”
Niles: “I mean…I hate it too, but it IS just a bath. She’s only means well, I’m sure.”
Daphne: “That’s not the point.”
Niles: “Isn’t it?”
Daphne: “Of course not.”
Niles: “Then, what is?”
Daphne: “One doesn’t just co-ed bathe in public, while their waste is excreted from the rocks and wiped off the bowl. It’s undignified.”
Niles: “Well…it’s better than swimming in poop, I guess.”
Daphne: “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that last bit.”
Niles: “…Anyway. At least we have fresh water now! And she’s so good about making sure it’s heat-adjusted and everything.”
Daphne: (Poking her head out, and working herself up so far that she eventually is full out of the cave, her fins all abristle.) “Oh. How kind of her not to accidentally ‘poach’ us after plopping us in plastic cups for thirty minutes and complaining about the ammonia smell as she grimaces and scrubs everything down, wearing those ridiculous ‘over-the-elbow’ double-strength plastic gloves, like we’re something TOXIC. Coughing and wheezing and ‘making faces.’ As if her own poop doesn’t stink…is how SHE acts. Which is a lie, thank you very much! I live here too you know! Am I right, or am I right?”
(Niles just floats there. Staring.)
Daphne: “Right?!”
Niles: “Huh? Sorry, what?”
Daphne: “Were you not listening?!”
Niles: “Sorry, I got distracted. You know…I mean…don’t take this the wrong way, but you’ve got a reeeeeally nice tail, you know that?”
Daphne: (Rolling her eyes.) “…Totally useless.”
Niles: “–Cuz I’m…seriously…I’m a ‘tail’ man you know, and uh, you have got GAME in that department, lady. If you know what I mean.”
Daphne: (Turning around.) “…Fucking idiot.”
Niles: “Huh? What? Did you…? Did you say something…?”
Daphne: “Goodnight, Niles.”
Niles: “YOU KNOW MY NAME?!”
(She retreats all the way into the cave and is not seen again for the rest of the night.)
Niles: “…She. Knows. My. Name. Heh heh heh. High Five!
(He pops up a fin.)
Niles: “Oh. Yeah. …Damn.”
~D
