Self Expression Magazine

Ladies, Let’s Talk

Posted on the 27 February 2014 by Sonica Jackson @sonicajackson

Ladies, Let’s Talk

Okay, ladies. So now that the series finale of Being Mary Jane has been seen this week, it’s time for us to get down to business and get back to reality. For those of you that don’t know about the show, let me just go ahead and give you the break down: Being Mary Jane is a show on the BET network that’s based off of a character by the name of Mary Jane Paul, played by actress, Gabrielle Union. The character has an outstanding career as a newscaster but her love life is highly chaotic because she’s involved with a married man by the name of Andre Daniels, played by actor, Omari Hardwick.

Although Being Mary Jane is a very entertaining drama series that will get you hooked on the first episode, I find it rather disturbing that so many women are acting as if Mary Jane is giving them hope in regards to getting involved with married men. Mary Jane is not the spokesperson for finding true love; she’s the spokesperson for being a home wrecker. At one point, there was a commercial on TV with several women saying, “I am Mary Jane” as if that’s something to be proud of. Ladies, please listen to me: You guys are not following directions in regards to how you’re supposed to watch this show.

When the show comes on, you’re supposed to sit Indian-style your couch with a big bowl of popcorn, a tall glass of Coke, watch the show, and talk back to the screen when Mary Jane is doing something stupid. Afterwards, you’re supposed to flip the channel to something else that’s entertaining and then finally go to bed. That’s it! However, many women are acting as if Mary Jane is giving them the green light to be whores. Ladies, please hear what I’m saying to you: Don’t let this show be the reason that you get a bullet in your behind by a crazed wife. My suggestion to you will be for you to get a grip on reality and quit thinking that you have a chance with someone else’s husband.  And while I’m on this subject, let me help you put to rest two lies that some of you keep telling yourself:

1. “Well, if his wife was doing what she should be doing to keep him satisfied, he wouldn’t be dealing with me.”

First of all, if you were as “amazing” as you think you are, you would be able to get a man of your own versus settling for table scraps. And you know that’s the truth. If you can’t be honest with anyone else, at least be honest with yourself. You may think that you got that “top shelf” kind of lovin’ but the truth of the matter is that the majority of you are messing around with a married man because you know that deep down in your heart, you’re not good enough to be a man’s first choice. You’re desperate for companionship and you don’t want to deal with the devastating blow of a good and ELIGIBLE man not wanting you because he feels that you’re not good enough for him. So you settle for someone that belongs to someone else. That’s why Mr. Married Man has been successfully playing you like a game of spades because he knows that you’re too lost to figure out this scenario for yourself.

2. “It’s not my fault that her husband is cheating with me. I’m not the reason why they’re having problems in their marriage.”

Honey, have a classroom full of seats. If you believe this nonsense, it’s no wonder that you’re in second base. Stop using this lie as an excuse to not feel like the home wrecker that you are. It may not be your fault as to why he decides to cheat on his wife but you can best believe that you are definitely a contributing factor to the problem because you have ALLOWED yourself to be involved in it. With each tear that falls down his wife’s face due to her husband’s infidelity, YOU ARE PARTLY RESPONSIBLE. If his kids are hurting because their dad is not home, YOU ARE PARTLY RESPONSIBLE. If the in-laws are forced to take sides because of his infidelity, YOU ARE PARTLY RESPONSIBLE.  If he loses his family and his home, YOU ARE PARTLY RESPONSIBLE. If his wife decides to take her own life because she can’t deal with the hurt that infidelity causes, YOU ARE PARTLY RESPONSIBLE. Stop acting as if you’re the innocent party and that karma will skip your address. What you fail to realize is that when a man and a woman get married, that’s a covenant that they made with God. A covenant with God is not something to be played with. That’s serious business and if you choose to tamper with that covenant, you will pay the price in one form or another. Sleeping with a married man will not only effect the lives of others but it will also effect your life as well because whether you believe it or not, karma can come in any form. It may come in the form of your daughter who may just end up being just like you. It may come in the form a STD that you can’t get rid of. It may come in the form of you ending up in a marriage full of turmoil, with a husband that’s cheating on you with a woman that acts just like you. With every cause, there is an effect.

Ladies, by all means, enjoy the series Being Mary Jane but don’t be foolish enough to fall victim to imitating a fictitious character that was only meant to be for entertainment. In real life, the character Mary Jane will not be able to talk you off the ledge if Mr. Married Man breaks your heart. She’s not gonna stop by your house and dry your tears when he decides that he wants to work things out with his wife. She’s not gonna help you pick up the pieces of your life. So get a dose of some common sense and realize that in order to have what belongs to you, then you must let go of what doesn’t belong you.

Sonica

Copyright © 2014 by Sonica Jackson


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