I’ve fantasized about being locked out of work before. Many times. It’s a frequent “happy place memory” that I go to, in fact. But in the fantasy, I can’t get in and don’t want to.
…I guess you have to be specific with these things.
I had just finished pulling the front door closed, and was going to lock the final door in the upper warehouse when I realized that my keys were still on my desk inside.
…My keys to my car, my apartment, the campus gate…the works.
So, that sucked.
…But then, we always hide an ER key somewhere in the yard, for just this purpose…
…Only there was no ER key in any of the ER places…
…Which was confirmed with the WHS Pimp, over the phone, who was at that point about 35 minutes away, picking his kids up from school.
…And I had about the same amount of time to get to my Landlord’s, where I was (ironically) meeting to pay and get a duplicate of the only key that opens my front door, currently resting all peaceful right now, on my fucking desk.
…But (I bet you guessed already), they were already closed by the time I got there.
…And not by my own car (still locked in the yard) but via Boss’s, who I forced to come and try all his keys to open the damn door.
…But then, he lost all the ones that actually open the doors, so after however long of trying to break into the shop (another thing he isn’t good at)…I talked him into dropping me by my Landlord’s, hopefully to still meet and get the key…which still didn’t work out.
…So then I wandered, homeless and carless, to Ma’s . Who let me in. Cuz she has to. Cuz she’s my Ma.
…Followed by feeding me (another “Ma” thing), and then texts to the WHS Pimp, in hopes he returns sometime tonight to the WHS and will let me in, so I can sleep and shower and things like a grown up person, else I’ll be sleeping at Ma’s too, and she’ll have to get up and drive me to work in the morning at the butt crack of dawn, while wearing her PJ’s…like I’m 15 or something.
Alllll these damn complications, people!
…Just because I wasn’t “specific” when I said, “I wish I was locked outta that hell hole and could never get back in again.”
Stupid details.
~D
