The Art of Conversation

I currently work for a real estate agent, which I enjoy immensely. I craft many of her publications, including some online advertisements. We often work from her home, which means I spend much time with her youngest daughter and her friend hanging around.
These two girls are in eighth grade, and I have always stressed the ability to hold conversation with others, especially adults, as a vital skill to master. Lately, these girls have impressed me with their capability to converse.
Whenever I meet a new person and the conversation flows easily while maintaining my interest, I feel as if I have made a new friend, and at the least witnessed a wonderful first impression.
If you are finding yourself at a loss with conversation topics, or become nervous about starting a conversation... this list is for you! I have compiled some tips/ideas/conversation starters for those of you who have been struggling at parties and gatherings. These tips are all from PERSONAL experience! I sometimes get that nervous (want to go home right now) feeling, but you have to learn to weather the storm...by using the gift of gab!

1) Know a little bit about everything (as much as possible). My mom prides herself on teaching this to SisterT and me. You may be thinking that is impossible, but you'd be surprised how much you can learn by reading the paper.

• Watch your nightly news or morning show. I try to catch The Today Show every morning, especially the world/US news portion. If I want to learn more about a certain event, I use the Google News feature. 
• Read the paper... in print or online. The iPad is the perfect tool for keeping up to date with everything. Subscribe to a publication that you like. My family likes The Wall Street Journal. Every once in a while, I also like to check The New York Times. 
• Find a news related blog/web page that targets your age group. Scholastic has a great web page for kids that includes all current topics, such as women in war and "Making Sense of Making Cents"(fabulous article title, quite clever).
• Search for a political blog (there are many). Learn about views that you may not agree with... all the better for when you start a debate at your next dinner party. 
• Try different hobbies; be it knitting or boxing, you'll be able to share something new with somebody new. 

2) Listening is just as important as speaking in conversation. I am always impressed when somebody remembers something I have said in passing. For instance, as most of you know I started boxing a few weeks ago. Just the other day one of my workout friends asked me how it was going. Her interest in my athletic trials put me at ease before a difficult fitness class. I also feel that when other listen to me, ask me questions, and obviously take an interest in what I am saying, our bond increases. I am more likely to recommend someone for a job/task that cares about what I am saying. You may also learn an interesting fact about a friend or coworker while listening. 
A few months ago I began talking to a woman in one of my fitness classes. We started with light topics: weather, fitness instructors, Lululemon, etc. A couple weeks went by, we started talking about shopping, and I found out that she worked in retail. Another few weeks, and we discussed our family. Mind you, these are all about 5-10 minute conversations. She later informed me that her daughter was battling cancer. A month or so later, I asked her how her daughter was doing, and she told me that her daughter was in remission. I was so happy for her. This woman told me of how she lived every moment to the fullest, and that every day was a blessing for her family. She took her daughter and the rest of her family to Universal Studios for the Harry Potter experience. She ended up loving it. Our conversations grew into inspirations. 
3) Are you struggling to find things to talk about? Are you nervous standing with guests you don't know at a friend's party? Think to yourself... 20 Questions. At times I feel as if I am playing "20 Questions" at some gatherings. I wind up asking all the questions, and they give me one syllable responses. 

• How was school? Good. 
• Did you have fun on your trip? Yes. How was it? Crazy. 

My least favorite response, "I don't know." If someone asks if you know how to drive a moving vehicle, and you don't, then it is okay. But, if that is not the question, there is always room for elaboration. 

• What are your feelings on the gas increase? I don't know. 
• What are your feelings on the gas increase? I am hoping that the issues in the Middle East do not affect our economy as much as they are forecasted to do so. Hopefully, our country will continue to research new methods of producing and consuming energy. 

Try to ask questions that require more than a one syllable answer. Set a good example by answering their questions with thorough responses that initiate more conversation.
4) Lastly, always respect those you talk with. No matter what, we impact people's lives and they impact our life. They way you are remembered should matter, so speak with sincerity, interest, and respect.
I hope these tips help you in your next conversation. So long!