Diaries Magazine

The Cotton Bud

Posted on the 22 September 2011 by Thefatalfemme @The_Fatal_Femme
The Cotton Bud
What a wonderful and bemusing invention.
So small and yet so mighty.
I would argue that is the only thing that can comfortably clean your ear and yet, at the same time, come so close to eternally damaging it.
Who knew something so tiny could be so dangerous?
Like a Ninja.
'The Ninja Cotton Bud'
I'm now imagining little Ninja action toys using cotton buds in place of their swords. Like light-sabers.
Oh how the mind boggles.
But wait! It's not just ears that you can use cotton buds for. No no no. There are multiple uses. This invention really is versatile.
I personally use it to remove the mascara that I inevitably get all over my eyelids every morning. I'm not very dexterous. Or accurate. Ergo, a cotton bud has become vital to my daily routine.
Apparently you can also use them to apply make-up! WOW!
Just, wow.
Although, I must admit, I have this terrible phobia of dry cotton wool rubbing against my skin. It makes my teeth clench. I go all goosey.
I don't think I'll be doing that.
I've also read that you can use a cotton bud to dry in between your newborn baby's creased skin.
Isn't that a nice image?
I, currently, do no possess a newborn baby. But my sister is expecting in January.
Would it seem inappropriate of me to attend the birth armed with cotton buds instead of flowers?
"Congratulations! Can I just try this out?"
I have an image of me being shooed away by the mid-wife, clutching my cotton buds with such determination that my knuckles are white.
Perhaps I won't be doing that either.
How bizarre that on a Thursday, whilst cleaning my ears with a cotton bud (which is not medically recommended and I am not endorsing this in any way) I would find such inspiration.
Are there any other uses?
Am I missing out in the cotton bud world?
On Google, it says that they are often used in arts and crafts... but it didn't specify...
I'm not really an arts and crafts person.
I am quite arty.
But not very crafty...
The inventor of the cotton bud?
Leo Gerstenzang - I salute you.
Thanks to you I have never suffered from wet ears or smudgy eyes.
... and I hear that the Commonwealth Arts and Crafts Foundation are eternally grateful.
Watch this space...

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