Tiffany Noth of BloggyMoms asked us on Tuesday November 6, 2012 to write about..."A bridge I've burned... "
I keep hearing Dan Fogelburg sing in my head. “Lessons learned are like bridges burned, you only need to cross them but once… is the knowledge gained worth the price of the pain, are the spoils worth the cost of the hunt…”
I look back over my life and know I tend to hesitate when it comes to “burning bridges.”
I’m not sure where it was instilled in me that burning bridges was a dangerous thing to do – and I am not talking about true fire-setting, I am talking about being so sure to cut away former possibilities. Must be something my Mom used to teach along with “Don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched.”
The one bridge I burned that I know was the right thing to do: quitting my job with the County. It was a respectable job with good pay, great benefits and it was nearly killing me in a slow, downwardly spiral death. I worked with mentally ill folks and it wasn’t them who was causing my decline, it was the bureaucracy, my boss and an odd mix of co-workers.
I should have felt the red flag forming into a noose before I even said yes to the job, but I felt so much pressure to do the conventional 8 to 5 gig and if I did it, I could provide all the benefits for my family so my husband could do what he wanted to do which was start his own law firm.
I only lasted five years at that job.
Five years of not liking a job is five years too long in my book.
I only left because two of my clients threatened to kill me in two months which pushed me over the stress edge so I went on stress leave not knowing the train of events this would begin. With that experience, I got a nice, clear message from God to not go back.
I think it was He who offered me the torch, actually, via a poem I scribed while overlooking the ocean in Santa Monica. It was October 26, 1999. It feels like yesterday and sometimes I wonder if any of that period of my life really happened.
I have been living my happily unconventional life ever since. My children are so happy to have Mommy at home. They know if they need me, I show up. They know if they want me to chaperone or drive, I will. They know they are first and foremost of anything else, and they are and I am able to express it.
I can smell the smoke of that bridge fire. Sweet scent of saying yes to where I was meant to be and WHO I was meant to be.
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© 2012 by Julie Jordan Scott
Julie Jordan Scott has been a Life & Creativity Coach, Writer, Facilitator and Teleclass Leader since 1999. She is also an award winning Actor, Director, Artist and Mother Extraordinaire. She was twice the StoryTelling Slam champion in Bakersfield. She leads Writing Camp with JJS & this Summer will be traveling throughout the US to bring this unique, fun filled creative experience to the people wherever she finds the passion & the interest.
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