Self Expression Magazine

Learning: Anger Issue

Posted on the 23 July 2014 by Felicakes @felicakes

For every minute you remain angry, you five up sixty seconds of peace of mind - Ralph Waldo Emerson

On Facebook the other day, a someone on my timeline made a negative comment on a post. I won't go into it but I felt like it was a personal attack eventhough it was not. It was just a comment aimed at the topic in general. What she said really bothered me and I was not in a very good mood.  I was furious! How dare she said something like that?  One part of my brain told me that I should say something and tell her what I think and the other part of me basically said " don't be a dick".

I spoke about assessing and acknowledging my feelings the other day, and I had to literally tell myself to STOP, BREATHE and LET GO. It's hard for me to do this because I always think that it is either a personal attack on me or on something that I love.  I am learning that sometimes, I just need to let it be.  I can not control what people say or think and it is not a personal attack on me or what I believe in. 

I asked myself a few questions to calm myself down from being so angry. 

Why am I so angry?  Because she made a negative comment about something that I love and I am passionate about.

Can I do something about it?  Yes and No.  Yes, I can block her comments so that I no longer see what she has to say. No, because that is how she feels about it.

Is it personally attacking you?  No.  She was just making a general comment about the situation.

So why are you worked up? I am not sure.  Maybe it's because I felt like she should behaved better because she is much older than me and has more experience in life.  Just because she doesn't believe in it doesn't mean that she has to impose that on other people.

How can you let it go? I can't change her.  It is how she is, as long as she doesn't personally attack me or my family then, there is nothing to be so worked up for.

After scribbling down what I felt in my little notebook, I felt a little bit better.  I felt like the anger that was sitting heavily on my chest has lifted and I could breathe again.  This is a new skill for me.  Learning how to deal with anger and letting it go.  Babysteps but I am getting there.

I do like the person that I am becoming though.  Much calmer and less stressed.  Everything else seems small and I am not "sweating the small stuff

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