Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now, we are ok. - Thich Nhat Hanh
Nerves and fear are starting to get me now. My training for my Half Marathon in October is nearing the tapering end. I have manage to run a distance of 20kms once and I am fairly certain that I will be able to make it BUT doubt is slowly showing it's ugly head.
What happens if you can't make it? I don't think you can run the whole 21. something kilometers. What happens if you are the last one or worst, DNF (Did Not Finish)? It's a freaking party in my head I tell you. Some days, I feel like faking an injury so I don't have to run the distance. A friend very casually told me that he did not even train for his half marathon and he did it in under 2 hours. I was floored. How can this be? No training and sub 2 hours? The dark clouds of fear and doubt came in quick. I am doing all these training runs and I don't even think I can crack the 3 hour mark!
BUT I know I shouldn't be scared. I know I shouldn't listen to these sort of talk in my head because it's not going to get me anywhere. I know I should instead concentrate on the positive thoughts in my head and lastly, I know that fear and doubt is normal.
Feel the fear and do it anyway. To beat the fear, you have to just do it. - Leo Babauta ~ Zen Habits
So to Fear, I feel you, I acknowledge you and I will beat you because, I want to get my Medal. I want to be able to feel proud and tell people that YES, I have done a Half Marathon and I am working towards my first Marathon. I don't care what time I do it in, I will cross that finish line with a smile.
Right now, I am just going to continue with my training and I know at the end of the day, I am going to be alright. I would be so sore, but I am going to be A-OKAY.