Diaries Magazine

Smelly Cat

Posted on the 21 February 2012 by Thefriskyvirgin
Because my skin has decided to respond to the hard water and dry air by becoming the Sahara Desert, I’ve been forced to find a new super-duper moisturizer. 
I finally found one with rave reviews, 5 out of 5 stars.  Yeah, ordered that immediately.  Once it arrived, I ripped that stuff open and slathered it on my parched skin, which soaked it up like a sponge. 
All was well. 
Until…sniff.  Sniff.  Sniff. 
Aw, hell.  I smell like my dentist’s office.
Don’t get me wrong, it smells wonderful, but…it smells like my dentist’s office. 
This is a problem. 
I have this sometimes irrational fear of smells, namely those of doctor’s offices, hospitals, and dentist’s offices.   Hell, even the doctors themselves carry a foreboding scent.  Seriously, I’ve gagged when a doctor leaned in to look in my ear.
I’m thinking dating a doctor could be problematic?  Just a hunch.
When we almost lost my dad, we spent a lot of time in the hospital.  Just to get past my stupid smell fears, I found myself literally HAVING to go to my one, lone refuge in the hospital—the one place I could find solace and peace: The gift shop. 
Plus, it was the one place that didn’t stink. 
Oh, Dad, you’re out of snacks.  I’ll just pop down to the gift shop.
Dad, you need some toothpaste!  Gift shop!
What did you say? You want some more mints?  Gift shop!
Of course, I think a large part of it was that I wanted to get my dad tons of goodies to make him happy while he recovered.  Heck, the day he was moved from the ER, I got him a teddy bear to keep him company. 
I honestly didn’t realize just how important the gift shop was during that time.  I’m pretty sure it was the only thing that kept me sane and made me feel like I was doing something to make my dad smile. 
Anyway, I’ve developed this scent association…with my moisturizer…and the dentist.  It made me gag. So, now I have this scary-doctor-smell on my skin…and no gift shop.
Most people would think it smells wonderful. 
To me, I’m smelly cat.  Actually, I’m smelly cat with a gagging problem.
If the stuff doesn’t work PERFECTLY, then I’ll happily return it. Bye-bye smelly cat.
If, however, it works, then I guess I’ll be gagging my way to sweet skin.

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