Diaries Magazine

The "D" Word

Posted on the 04 June 2012 by Janedoemartini @janedoemartini
So, this is something I don't blog about and in fact, it's something that I'm completely brand new and clueless to: dating. Just the world alone makes me want to get my martini glass out. With school and training being done and with going back to the drawing board to figure out what I want to do next (besides master my Russian), if there's one thing that I've been negligent of the past year is dating. In fact, I was SO focused on school that I cut off my relationship because there was so much that was going on and I needed to remain 101% focused and not have any distractions. So when I was first introduced to dating recently, I was frankly overwhelmed. First off, what kind of man am I compatable with? Do I add on a filter to my mouth so when he asks me my opinions on important issues like politics and current events, I don't scare him off with what I'm actually thinking? Do I ACTUALLY wear a dress?? Heels or sandals? Light makeup? Mouth filter on or off? See where I'm getting at?  But I think the biggest challenge of the dating game was realizing that I'm THE biggest hypocrite. I tell people I try not to judge others which sincerely, I don't. I will talk to anyone, whether they are in a mansion or on the streets, whether they are male or female or even just standing behind me at the checkout line. But when it comes to dating? I come with a magnifying glass because I will take a man and analyze every single detail to death, from what his eyes tell me, to the way he presents himself, to the way he poses and his body language, to the sound of his voice and tone. I'm actually surprised that I don't ask for fingerprints and send them to the FBI Headquarters. I'd consult my close circle of friends about this and even they told me to "lighten up" and to keep an open mind, which I will take into serious consideration. I actually went to a nice lunch date and I actually put aside my combat boots and tac pants and opted for a cute summer look. Not very like me. The date? A rather nice gentleman that opened doors and engaged in intelligent, intillectual conversation. I was actually at ease and realized that I could be myself. For someone that has the most interesting and face-palming dating stories, this one was a breath of fresh air...Mission Accomplished!

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