True Blood Tuesday: She's Not There

Well, after a painfully long wait, we have finally reentered the freaky-fun world of True Blood, and, boy, were there some unexpected twists and turns!
Fairyland: The episode opens with Sookie arriving in faerie-world with her “fairy godmother,” Claudine.  The world is serene, calming, and beautiful.  Sookie runs into fellow telepath, Dallas bellboy Barry, who arrived with his fairy godmother…uh, godfather…whatever.  Almost immediately, Sookie and Barry are offered some glowing fruit. Sookie notices the humans enjoying this funky fruit a little too much and warns Barry to hold off, but he’s already indulging. 
While observing the humans, Sookie sees her Granddaddy Earl, looking exactly as he did when she was a little girl.  Believing he was absent for a mere week, Granddaddy Earl learns he has been gone for twenty years.  As they talked, Sookie began seeing some disturbing images: seriously creepy looking faeries, rotten light fruit, and moldy growth on faerie-land grounds. Realizing this place was a façade, she telepathically told her granddaddy that this is a trap and they need to escape. Unfortunately, it seems everyone in faerie-land is a telepath.
Here, we meet Queen Mab, a towering faerie with a desire to seal the portal between humanity and the faerie world. We learned last season that faerie blood allows vampires to walk in the sun, thus Mab, in an effort to save her kind, has been harvesting faerie hybrids. But when Mab tries to force-feed Sookie some of the tainted fruit, Sookie blasts her backwards, unveiling a sparse, dank reality where the faeries transform into rather hideous goblin-like creatures. 
Thought: Sookie, a half-faerie, blasted Queen Mab? Is Sookie more powerful than even she knows? Something to ponder…
Claudine’s brother, a member of the rebel faeries, wants the portal to remain open, and rushes to save Sookie and Granddaddy Earl from Mab and her wild light-grenade throwing groupies.  He leads them to the edge of faerie-world, but warns that only Sookie can return because she didn’t eat the light fruit. Sookie, not wanting to leave her granddaddy, hesitates, giving Mab enough time to start closing the portal.  Granddaddy Earl grabs Sookie and jumps. 
Bon Temps: The return & time warp.  Back in Bon Temps, Sookie bids a teary farewell to Granddaddy Earl, who begins rapidly aging and dies next to her grandmother’s grave, bursting into a cloud of dust. Just before he passes, Granddaddy Earl gave her his pocket watch to give to Jason.  It was a sweet, but very sad and quick reunion.
Meanwhile, the second Sookie arrives back in Bon Temps, we see Eric and Bill in their respective sleeping spots, both waking upon sensing her return.
Sookie, believing she was gone for only 15 minutes, discovers she was really gone for over a year in the human realm.  Everyone thought she was dead and believed Bill killed her. 
Many changes have occurred in the year since Sookie disappeared: Jason is now a well-respected officer; Andy is a cop hooked on V; Jason sold Sookie’s house; Arlene has had her devil-baby; Tara is a lesbian and a cage fighter; humans are picketing outside of Fangtasia; with the help of Bill and Eric, the AVL (American Vampire League) is working overtime, filming PSA’s and the like, to win over humans after Russell’s antics; and witches have come to Bon Temps.
Now, let’s break it down by the characters:
Jessica & Hoyt: Their house is all fixed up and they are living in bliss…but not really. Jessica is restless, craving humans to feed upon, while Hoyt wants her to be a little more domesticated (cook him dinner, try to eat human food, etc).  After laughing over a little argument, Hoyt and Jessica go to Fangtasia for date night.  While Hoyt is getting drinks, sexy-dancing-Jessica is tempted by a male fang-banger, but stays loyal to her boyfriend.
Thought: What about that creepy baby doll we saw in their house at the end of last season? Maybe the rumored haunted house story will come into play later on.    Arlene & Terry: Terry has clearly taken a liking to being a daddy. Arlene, however, is scared to death of Rene’s child. When she comes home and finds the baby has beheaded a half-dozen Barbie dolls, she wigs.
Lafayette & Jesus: Though still going strong, Lafayette is less than thrilled about going to a coven meeting with Jesus.  So, onto Moon Goddess Emporium, where Lafayette witnesses head witch Marnie on some other plane, talking to the dead.  He makes light of the situation until Marnie channels vampire Eddie. Later in the show, Lafayette reluctantly joins hands with the other witches and helps to momentarily bring Marnie’s pet bird, Minerva (I really want to make a Harry Potter joke here, since Marnie is played by none other than Fiona Shaw, who portrayed Aunt Petunia in the Potter films.) back to life.  Now, the stage is set for a little witch-undead match up.
Tara (a.k.a. Toni) and Naomi: Tara is now a fighter in New Orleans and is in a lesbian relationship with Naomi, a fellow fighter. The problem? When Lafayette texts Tara about Sookie being alive, Tara lies to Naomi and says her father just texted about her grandmother’s passing.  Um, Naomi thinks Tara comes from Atlanta. Oh, and she thinks Tara’s name is really Toni.  Tara wanted to start over…guess that’s what she’s done.
Sam, Tommy, Luna: Sam actually did shoot Tommy in the leg at the end of last season.  Tommy, who is undergoing physical therapy, now lives with Hoyt’s mother.  Since Hoyt defected to the dark side, Maxine is eager to treat Tommy like a son—which means Tommy kinda dresses and acts like a dweeb. 
Meanwhile, Sam has been attending anger management classes, which basically amounts to having wine, talking, and shifting into horses with three fellow shifters, one of which is the lovely Luna. Clearly, Luna and Sam will soon be one of our new Bon Temps couples.
Jason & Hotshot: Now a respected police officer, Jason has taken the role of watcher, both to V-addict Andy, as well as the helpless people of Hotshot, just as Crystal asked. On another visit to Hotshot, Jason brings some food and supplies, but one of the teens tells him the freezer is broken again. Jason, ever the good guy, goes to take a look, but while bending into the freezer, the teen hits him over the head, pushes him into the freezer, and locks it.  Way to appreciate all the help he’s given them!
Sookie & Portia: Sookie seeks legal help to get her house back from the new buyers. Enter Portia Bellefleur, Andy’s sister, and attorney. Portia comes off as a bit snooty, but agrees to keep digging into the mysterious new owners of Sookie’s house.  Sookie dipped into Portia’s brain for a moment and heard her talking about how she hopes Sookie doesn’t go running back to Bill, especially since he hardly even speaks her name anymore. See what I mean? Snooty.
Thought: Could Portia have a thing for Bill? The “new owners” have put over $50,000 into fixing up Sookie’s home. Can we all scream, “FINALLY!” I am so happy to see her house clean of all the dirt and grime from when that maenad lived there.
Sookie & Bill: Though genuinely happy to see Sookie alive, you can tell Sookie is not ready to forgive him.  After all, to her, it’s only been fifteen minutes since he broke her heart.  For me, their brief reunion seemed strained. 
Bill: There was a HUGE twist in Bill’s storyline—Bill is the KING of Louisiana.  Reckon he defeated the Queen! One of the witches in the coven is spying for King Bill and informs him of Marnie’s success in bringing a bird back to life. 
Thought: I may be wrong, but I’m thinking there was a spark between Bill and this little spy lady. 
Sookie & Eric: Eric reveals that while Sookie’s friends, family, and even Bill Compton believed she was dead, he never did.  It was so sweet…and, um, sooooo sexy. At the end of the episode, Sookie, after having a shower, took off her cover-up and tossed it over her shoulder…and it never hit the floor.  When she turned around, she found Eric standing behind her, holding her cover-up, and soaking in every inch of her body. She quickly grabbed something to cover herself, but Eric got his eyes full and moaned about how strange it is when reality matches what he imagined for so long. 
Sookie says she rescinded his invitation, but Eric reminds her that she no longer owns the house.  Slowly, Eric reaches into his pocket and pulls out some keys. Eric now owns Sookie’s house. He figures that if he owns her house, he owns Sookie. The episode ended with him standing over her saying, “You are mine.” Oh, and he flashed a little fang.  Sigh.  
And there we have it! Welcome back to Bon Temps! What did y'all think of your first trip back to crazy town?