Self Expression Magazine

How To Lose A Wedding Ring

Posted on the 09 May 2012 by Msadams @HilaryFerrell

Everyone in life has one fatal flaw.  For my husband that fatal flaw has to be his propensity to lose/forget things.

Like the time he left his wallet on the Metro, where it was subsequently picked up by some teenagers who wracked up a bunch of crazy charges on our credit cards.

And there were a few more times after that where he left his wallet on the Metro again but I realized it before we exited the train.  Not to mention the umbrellas, parking tickets, hats, bags, containers, etc. that have mysteriously disappeared.

I love him despite this forgetfulness because usually it’s not a big deal—except, of course, when you lose your wedding ring.

Let me set the scene for you.

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Mr. A was down in South Carolina this weekend visiting family and friends, when he decided to jump on the crazy machine that you see above.

I’m not surprised he hopped on the chance to ride his friend’s jet ski as I had gently kyboshed that idea when we went on our Caribbean vacation.  Thinking that with Mr. A’s penchant for speed, we’d somehow end up in a broken down hospital in the middle of nowhere.

Mr. A’s forgetfulness also extends to taking proper precautions for not losing valuable items.  So he hopped on the jet ski with his wedding ring and Oakley sunglasses.

Apparently, everything was going along fine until he went to take over a wave.  Not knowing that he needed to take the wave head on, he decided to throttle harder and attack the wave diagonally.

Proving to be much stronger than the jet ski, the wave tossed him off, scrapping his knuckles across the handlebars.

Contemporaneously, the wave mugged him of his property—shooting off his sunglasses and ripping off his wedding ring.

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By the grace of God, the only major injury he sustained was a nasty gash to his finger and some “I told you so” mantra from his wife.

Luckily, knowing his aforementioned penchant for losing things, I didn’t purchase a super expensive wedding ring to begin with—in fact, I actually got it from Overstock.

I figured it would be a starter ring to see how long Mr. A could keep something valuable until losing it.

Apparently the answer is 342 days.

At this rate, he’ll go through about 50 rings in his lifetime.

Let’s hope Overstock offers a repeat customer discount icon wink How To Lose A Wedding Ring


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