Friday morning, 12/21/12. The end of days according to an ancient Mayan calendar. And all I was thinking about was the End of the World party at B&J;'s. What a fun day this turned out to be.
I arrived at B&J;'s at my usual late lunch time, 2:00, said hi to Future Mrs. Cantu at the register, worked my charm on her until she was surely seeing fireworks and wanting to scribble my name on old cash receipts over and over while drawing hearts around my name thinking of how many kids we'll have, ordered the ultra delicious chick parm' sandwich, inhaled it, and then kicked back and waited. Bruce said he was set to arrive around 3ish. I texted Maldonado to see if he wanted to join which he did. He told me of his adventures Wednesday night that I had passed on, but from the sounds of things i probably should have gone. Just as he's leaving, Bruce and his wife Colleen show. We sit down at the bar and slowly but surely our adventure begins. 
The word of the day was most definitely "survived" :)
I think my first sense that something was odd was when a nurse and her surgeon husband showed up, sat down next to Bruce and Colleen, and the nurse started getting really friendly and touchy feely instantly with everybody around her. She wasn't paying any attention to her husband, and you could tell from the way he would look in the other direction and down into his beer that this wasn't the first time this had happened. Our group was getting larger, Jaime showed up, then Kenny and Patsy, then Sprunger, and the rest of the bar was filling up too. The St. Arnold's Christmas Ale cask was tapped, and the beer (or wine if you're Colleen or Jaime) was going down smooth for everybody.
Cheers to the End of the World from Eric Cantu on Vimeo. I'm not sure what the flirty nurse or her husband were drinking, but I'm guessing they were enjoying the Hercules Double IPA's like we were. The thing with double IPA's is that this one in particular is delicious, but it's also around 10% alcohol content. In other words it will sneak up on you pretty quick. Well it definitely snuck up on this girl because she's practically fingering Colleen's cast and is going from guy to guy at the bar looking like she wants to take one home while her husband sits and drinks more beer. She starts talking to me, and it's the normal small talk: "How tall are you?", "Oh, so you're a firefighter", "You live around here?", "Got any siblings?". "Yeah, I have 3 way older brothers." I answer. "Oh so you were the accident," she says as she laughs. "Oh ill make it look like an 'accident' alright..." says her husband from behind her at his seat at the bar. Allllllllllllriiiiiighty then. "I prefer 'miracle' over 'accident'" I say to her, ignoring her husband. "Oh it'll be a 'miracle' shot..." he says. Well now he's just pissing me off. "Can I have your number?" she asks. This girl doesn't care that her husband is 2 ft away. Meanwhile he's now talking to Hector asking him how accurate he is with a rifle at 500 yards and bragging about how many guns he owns and how he has one with him. Greeeeeat. The Mayans weren't predicting the end of the world, they were just predicting the end of our world cuz this guy's gonna shoot us all.
Pretty much right on cue with that, Sprunger, Kenny and Patsy leave. Lol. Thanks, guys. The husband storms out and immediately her phone is blowing up. She's ignoring the calls, and now has another dude sitting next to her who she's all over. Right when you think the husband drama is over he comes back. Ohhhhhhh craaaap. That's never good. He starts cussing her out, makes a huge scene, then points at each of us individually saying "I'm gonna remember you, and you, and you, and you.." This sets Bruce off. "Are you threatening us??..No one threatens my friends!!" There we go. Thats a real buddy for you. Love you, Bruce. We pull Bruce back and our bartender Joseph takes charge telling this husband that if he doesn't leave he's calling the cops. "Go ahead" the husband says, so Joseph does. Fortunately for us, this guy was all talk and leaves before the cops arrive. Disaster averted. Wow. Okay, what now? Lets go to Molly's! Lol. Bruce and Colleen call it a night and say their goodbyes while me, Hector and Jaime continue on with the darkness.
You're not cool enough for these glass horns, they probably saved the day
Molly's
I just noticed that Hector is sticking his tongue out in each of those last 3 pics. Odd.
Molly's it is. It's packed. We're having beers and downing shots. And somewhere in the middle of all this fun I have to get in some wannabe gangster's face who's crowding Jaime, tell him to back off, and start flipping the bill of his cap up over and over when he doesn't stop. "Don't flip my cap again, dog." [flip]. "I'm serious don't do that aga.." [flip]. "Dog, don't start shi.." [flip]. Well at this point all the bartenders are yelling at us to stop, the bouncers are making their way over, and I'm not listening cuz for some reason I'm in the red and have the Eye of the Jew. He crowds her again (or atleast I felt like he did), I flip his cap up one more time, the bouncer gets in my face, but then in a moment of clarity i manage to calmly say, "It's not me, it's him.. he's crowding her and wont stop." Another bouncer whispers in the first bouncer's ear, and just like that, the wannabe gangster is escorted out. Sweet. Disaster averted again. Whew. All is calm. For a split second i thought i was gonna get kicked out. Okay, what now? Lets go to the beach! Exactly. Why not? So we do.We make a quick stop at my place to pick up beer that is instantly destroyed when, upon arriving at the beach, Hector falls down the steps leading down onto it, breaking half the bottles and covering the remaining cans in sand. Have you ever drank beer buried in sand? "Mmm.. This beer is delicious.. [crunch, crunch]". Lol. I should have known the beach trip was doomed when the entire drive over there Jaime is asking me, "Are you asleep?.." over and over and over. "Umm.. I'm DRIVING this vehicle and TALKING to you, I'm not asleep." Haha. What a night. It was worth Hector destroying the beer just to watch him spend 4 minutes tossing and turning in the sand trying to get up. "What happened?" Jaime asked when she walked up on us. "Uhh, Hector's digging for sunken treasure. Here's a beer." We eventually left around a quarter till 5 in the morning. Somewhere between Hector rolling around in the sand and me and Jaime finishing the rest of the sandy beer and making our way to my ride, Hector calls for a cab cuz he thinks we left him. You cant make this stuff up. We eventually get him to my ride and drive home happily safe and sound, waking up on my couches with plenty of sand everywhere as a reminder of the adventures we had.
Saturday was definitely a day of rest, and then yesterday was spent at Station 1. Santa (not the real one i dont think) stopped by the station and the kids and families who gathered seemed to really enjoy it. But wow, what a Friday. Survived the end of the world with a bad ass adventure. Suhweet. On the agenda today: the second annual seafood gumbo feast at my house. Stay tuned.
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